Memorial Day!

Christian and his PAPA!

A quick glimpse of her sweet personality!

They are all leaning! lol This was not on purpose!

This year we spent memorial day weekend with my mom and my step dad! We had a great time just hanging around the house. We grilled out on the deck and just enjoyed our time as a family. Colin and I are always so thankful that our family can come out to visit. It makes being away just a little easier on the both of us. Not to mention that Christian LOVES LOVES LOVES all the attention! :-)

Avah's Home!

That's right we are finally home now. I could not tell you how excited I was to get the news from the Doctor and the nurses. We are so glad to be back in our home. Avah had a follow up apt. yesterday. Her ANC levels are back down to 700. They still do not know what is causing this. They called the specialist at Fairfax and he said as long as she is eating and acting normal then there is nothing to worry about and it will take time. If she does develop a fever we will have to bring her back to the ER but to Fairfax this time so that the specialist can watch over her. Infants are already little bundles of warm joy so I am constantly worried. Thanks to Jen for supplying us with a temporal thermometer. It's super easy and works really quick. It is so frustrating not knowing what is wrong. But I know that God is watching over our little angel. Over the last couple of days she has started to have such a little personality. She has been smiling and cooing which is super cute. I hope that we can get through this and that she will be better. A special thanks to my husband and to his mom. They both have been very helpful. It was nice knowing that Christian was home with his Gunga so it put less of a strain on me. Also, thankyou Colin for always asking if we needed something and if I was okay. We are not allowed to take her anywhere since her WBC is so low. She basically has no immune system right now. I pray that by next thursday she will be cleared. We are expecting the arrival of PaPa Toe and MiMi on Friday night! I'm so glad to be able to see my mom again!

Part 3

Avah in her bed!

Sporting her super cute pink tape!

Smiles for mommy! Her eyes were open until the camera flashed
this was a great treat for me this morning
as my spirits have been a little down lately!

So with only 5 hours of sleep last night i'm going to blog please forgive me if I don't make sense sometimes. Last night was AWFUL Avah's schedule is so messed up from being in the hospital she decided it was going to be party time last night and that she would like to win the award for the loudest baby on the ward. Avah did not get to sleep last night until 3 am. I went outside to get some water and ice at 2:30 and it was a ghost town. All the other babies were out. The nurse that was on duty last night was ..... not that great(i'm being nice). She managed to forget to connect the anti-biotics and medication was all over the floor. Avah had just fallen asleep and I didnt notice the medication so you know what happened next they had to reconnect the anti-biotics clean the floor which required them to turn on all of the lights. Avah woke up and was not happy. It turned out to be round 16 of attempting to get her to go back to sleep. When the charge nurse came in to the room she was NOT very happy and ended up taking care of us for the rest of the shift. She went to get Avah a nice little T-shirt and some sweet little pants. On a much better note we got Avah's results back this morning and her WBC is now at 1600 which is awesome Thank God!!! Please keep Christian in your prayers when he is tired and worn he has been lashing out at Colin's mom. I guess he doesn't want his mommy to be replaced which is totally understandable. I wouldn't want her to be replaced either :-) Thankyou all for your prayers! They are much needed! P.S. Even though the nurse last night wasn't that great the staff at Fair Oaks has been great! They are constantly asking if we need anything or if there is any way that they can help out. Last night the Tech even offered to come in the room and hold Avah while I slept! So Thanks to all of the staff here!

Part 2

Well it's about 10:52 at night and here I am still awake. That's right I cannot come to terms with the late nights and the serious lack of sleep. Who would have ever thought that the hospital would be so exhausting. As of right now I have chapped lips and somewhat of a cold. Colin and Christian came to visit tonight and when they left I was so broken hearted. I am ready to get out and go home because first of all it would mean that Avah was well and second of all i would be able to be with my family in my own house. Christian cried when he left tonight and boy did it break my heart! I love and miss that little guy so much. Tonight should be interesting because there is only ONE nurse on duty! Her assistant is in the NICU. For those of you who have had to stay for an extended period of time know how agrivating the constant beeping of the machines are. And how annoying it is to have to write down whens the last time you breastfed or changed a poopy or pee diaper. Avah has passed two stools in the last two days which is awesome. She did however have a fever late tonight of 99 but they will be checking it again at 12. It could have been from being stimulated by her bath. Tomorrow they will take more blood and then we should get the results sometime around 11 or 12. I am praying that her WBC will have gone up so that way we could possibly go home!!!!!!!!! If not they will either take her off the anti-biotics for 24 hours and see if that works or they will have to administer antibiotics for eight more days which means that we could possibly be in here until the end of next week. Not good since my mom and step dad are coming in to visit. I also pray that Christian and Colin will be at peace at home without me.

Hospital visit...Part 1

Hello to all. We are currently at Fair Oaks Hospital because on Monday night Avah came down with a fever of 101.4. We called the advice nurse at our peds office and she told us to take her to the emergency room and not to administer any tylenol. I jumped in our car and drove to Fair Oaks Hospital. My triage nurse was super nice and kept me in the back room so that I didn't have to wait in the waiting room with coughing people and what not. Once we got into our room they told us that they would have to do a spinal tap. They tried once and didn't get any spinal fluid so they called the Pediatric Doctor on call. He came in and administered the spinal tap and was able to get enough for the cultures. It broke my heart to have to walk out of that room but I knew that it was necessary. Colin wasn't at the hospital so our gracious friend Jen helped out ( Thankyou so much). Jen stayed with Christian while Colin came and met me. They didn't get us into our room until 2 o'clock so we were really exhausted. Colin went home once Avah and I were settled in and we both got a little rest until it was time to feed. Avah realy does not like being hooked up to any of the monitors. She has managed to pull her oxygen monitor off three times and has riped her iv out. She's def. ready to get back home. Today we got a visit from Mrs. Teri who popped in on us. It was so nice to have a visitor and someone to help out. She got to spend some special moments holding Avah and it allowed me to have a little break. Colin also came over to visit and bring big brother Christian to see his little sister. They went to Moby Dick's and picked up diner which was so thoughtful! (I love you!) The nurses thought Christian was adorable and that his attempts at pooping in the hospital potty deserved toy trucks. They have been so nice and so thoughtful to all of us. They love Avah so much that they will wrap her i.v with either purple or pink tape lol. She is also in the cutest baby gown! It's so tiny and looks just like an adult gown. In the meantime i recieved a call from my OB/GYN telling me that I would have to reschedule my apt. and I wouldn't be able to get in until May 27th needless to say I am pretty bumbed. But hey God has a reason for everything. Colin called his mom this afternoon to ask her if she could possibly fly in and stay with Christian tomorrow while he goes into work and she said YES! They will be picking up Gunga from the airport late tonight! I really just want to thank everyone for their prayers and especially thank those who have gone out of their way to help us. It is such a blessing to have all of you in our lives! Thanks so much!

I miss you!

If you look really closely Avah looks just like me!

Sweet memories!

A man from Norfolk , VA called a local radio station to share this on Sept 11th, 2003, TWO YEARS AFTER THE TRAGEDIES OF 9/11/2001.His name was Robert Matthews. These are his words:A few weeks before Sept. 11th, my wife and I found out we were going to have our first child. She planned a trip out to California to visit her sister. On our way to the airport, we prayed that God would grant my wife a safe trip and be with her. Shortly after I said 'amen,' we both
heard a loud pop and the car shook violently. We had blown out a tire. I replaced the tire as quickly as I could, but we still missed her flight. both very upset, we drove home..I received a call from my father who was retired NYFD. He asked what my wife's flight number was, but I explained that we missed the flight.
My father informed me that her flight was the one that crashed into the southern tower. I was too shocked to speak. My father also had more news for me; he was going to help. 'This is not something I can't just sit by for; I have to do something.'I was concerned for his safety, of course, but more because he had never given his life to Christ. After a brief debate, I knew his mind was made up. Before he got off of the phone, he said, 'take good care of my grandchild. Those were the last words I ever heard my father say; he died while helping in the rescue effort.My joy that my prayer of safety for my wife had been answered quickly became anger. I was angry at God, at my father, and at myself. I had gone for nearly two years blaming God for taking my father away. My son would never know his grandfather, my father had never accepted Christ, and I never got to say good-bye.Then something happened. About two months ago, I was sitting at home with my wife and my son, when there was a knock on the door. I looked at my wife, but I could tell she wasn't expecting anyone. I opened the door to a couple with a small child.
The man looked at me and asked if my father's name was Jake Matthews. I told him it was. He quickly grabbed my hand and said, 'I never got the chance to meet your father, but it is an honor to meet his son.'He explained to me that his wife had worked in the World Trade Center and had been caught inside after the attack. She was pregnant and had been caught under debris. He then explained that my father had been the one to find his wife and free her. My eyes welled up with tears as I thought of my father giving his life for people like this. He then said, 'there is something else you need to know.'His wife then told me that as my father worked to free her, she talked to him and led him to Christ. I began sobbing at the news.Now I know that when I get to Heaven, my father will be standing beside Jesus to welcome me, and that this family would be able to thank him themselves .When their baby boy was born, they named him Jacob Matthew, in honor of the man who gave his life so that a mother and baby could live.This story should help us to realize this: God is always in control. We may not see the reason behind things, and we may never know this side of heaven, but God is ALWAYS in control. Please take time to share this amazing story. You may never know the impact it may have on someone.. God doesn't call the qualified, He qualifies the called. Give thanks to the Lord for He is good. His love endures Forever. Psalm 136:1

One of my friends e-mailed this to me and normally I don't even take the time to read these e-mails and consider them junk. This one def. hit home! As you know if you are reading this my father passed away in September of 07' I still cannot believe that it will be almost two years that we have not seen him. It breaks my heart every day to know that he will not be able to spend time with Avah but to know that she will never know her grand-dad. When I was pregnant with Avah I thought okay this won't be that bad. But everyday since I have had her I think about my dad wishing that he would get to hold her and spend time with her. When I see Colin holding Avah I enjoy and soak up every minute of it because there really is nothing more beautiful than a father holding his daughter, Like story above I was able to be the last one to talk to my dad. He said I LOVE You and it was such a blessing to know that those are the last words he said to me. A week later I received a package in the mail that was from my dad and it had a letter in it. If any of you know my dad doesn't write letters. It was a blessing to have that. So even though my heart is still filled with pain for losing my dad, I do know that God has a plan for everything. This major event in my life has caused me to re-think my Christian walk. It has also helped to grow as a person! I don't know if my dad was saved or not? But at least I can rest my faith in Jesus and be assured that if he was and if I walk in his path I will be saved and shall to find out if he was..............

Midnight !

That is exactly what I would like to call last night's feeding. While feeding Avah last night she managed to explode! Out of her diaper and all over her clothes (Yes you know with what!) All the mean while my sleepy commentator was trying to give me lovely advice WHILE asleep. I know pretty helpful right lol. After she exploded I decided to go and get another gown. Well, we have a huge bassinet in our room ridiculous. It is actually a pack and play that turns into a bassinet. Well it's way to big for the room so I decided to climb over Colin as he was asleep, well since I was really tired at 12 o'clock I didnt really get the climb part right. The heel of my foot scraped against the whole frame of the bed. It was really painful as I lay on the floor screaming! Sorry God for using words that I don't remember! And then I managed to forget that my two year old was asleep and slam the door because YES I was mad at myself for doing that. Luckily Christian did not wake up. Needless to say that I will not be able to wear any sort of shoe for a while since it will rub against my scraped heel. What did I learn from this. Always keep a spare outfit next to me in bed! lol